Orthodontia and pubes don't mix
Ladies and gentlemen,
After reading this, there's a good chance you might not look at teeth-braces with a straight face for the rest of the week..
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Coming in at Number 9...(but with a perfect 10 on the Comedy-Scale)
TOP 10 CUNNILINGUS MISTAKES --- Collegesexadvice.com
9. Orthodontia and pubes don't mix
Some of you may still be wearing braces. If so, make sure she shaves or at least trims, or you're going to end up snagged in her short curlies. It'll be extremely painful for her and gross for you when you have to pick the hairs out of your teeth. Of course, the worst is if you're cheating on your girlfriend and she spots someone else's pubes in your teeth.
Technorati Tags: Singapore
A hideously fun, and large party
Let the dancing detritus be like the mesmerizing, falling snow.
Let us presume, that it is a hideously fun, and large party,
it is a large city, and you are here.
And the colour is grey.
The train is very crowded and the music is loud
imagining our bodies and our faces,
and you are all smiling and dazed.
and our kisses, and our embrace.
And I took my frozen coat, and
“…dipped it in a vat of sadness, rubbed it in disappointment, squeezed out excess happiness and zipped it back on.”
ONE OF THE PEOPLE IN THIS ROOM RIGHT NOW WILL BE IN YOUR BED
for the sake of perfect symmetry.
Www.youth.sg -- Random Thoughts
10 Random Thoughts After my www.youth.sg WorkGroup Newcomers' meeting
[I volunteered to join this youth web portal project and we had our meeting at Pacific Coffee, CitiLinc on Sunday. ]
In the spirit of the Hitchhikers' Guide, Let us start with a loooooong lunch, and then begin at Number 12 (yes, no. 12, on a list of 10 Random Thoughts).
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[Imagined Slogans by Meekia]
12. "Do Something" --- www.youth.sg 2005 slogan
13. "Do Something leh" ---- www.youth.sg 2006 spring/summer slogan
13.5 "Do Something hor" --- www.youth.sg 2006 autumn/winter slogan
14. "Do Something please..." 2007 slogan.
15. "Aiya, just do whatever you want." 2008
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(Random Musings)
1. The gahmen funds it. But doesn't run it. Sorta.
2. Julian told me to get the receipt (so that he could make claims for us right? Welfare gesture I believe?). Or was I hallucinating? (Yes, I drove despite the fact that I was only half-awake....)
3. If I am suddenly hit with a persistent bout of social conscience, it doesn't matter whether the resources I get are govt-linked, or not. My social conscience and the need to get this meaningful project going/finished, is more important than philosophical (big brother is so uncool loh) posturing.
4. Does no. 3 make sense? Will any young individual think that way?
5. "Coolness is overrated, especially with youths who have the social conscience and community awareness to initiate the sort of well-meaning projects they did."
5.4 Hmz...Just because I am socially aware, it doesn't mean I don't want to appear cool hor. Don't assume.
5.5 Youths in general...is coolness that important to them?
6. Yes.
7. Undeniably, we do things at times with the presumption that it would make us appear "cool."
8. That presumption is mostly stupid. [But we do it anyway. (Did anyone watch AppleSeed at the SIFF? Now THAT, that film's sound design is cool)]
9. Will our www.youth.sg publicity and outreach be VIRAL?
10. Massive campaigns.. instant attention. Massive GOVT campaigns...errr....Instant Disdain? (big brother shouting and singing and advertising heavily is so uncool loh). [See case study:: McDonald's "I'm Loving It" hip-hop posturing failure. ]
11. The Hitchhikers' Guide to the Galaxy movie will SO disappoint Douglas Adams' fans.
Hurt. Heard. Herd.
It began with my routine visit to Mrbrown's blog. I was looking forward to another tongue-in-cheek blog on the IRs (integrated resorts). But before I could get down to reading his latest column, I found his latest posting - "Help Steve find more mature blogs than this one."The part-time Universally lecherer, and essentially the entire Sg blogosphere audience, had just been conveniently labelled "infantile" by Mr Steven McDermott.Mr Steven McDermott also pointed to xiaxue's blog as a sign of the apocalypse. Ok, well, he didn't. He did however, name-drop it beside mrbrown's blog as he lamented the lack of intellectual musings and discourse in the Sg blogosphere.Angered by this ignoRANT Singabloodypore blogger, I decided to show him the way to BOX REPUBLIC, where the Hurt Herd can be Heard.------------------------------------------------Comment No. 60, on "Singabloodypore: The Infantile Blogosphere"------------------------------------------------So along came a man, with his head in a small box.
He brought with him, a box labelled "Infantilism." It was a very small box...smaller than the box around his head.There are bigger, more beautiful boxes here on this beautiful island! But I guess when your head is locked inside a small box, you hold the tail of an elephant, and say, "SNAKE!!" Infantile? How about looking at Xiaxue's blog through the prisms and precepts of Third Wave Feminism before sticking on that label?The man with his head in a small box, was clearly lost. I wasn't sure where he was going, but I knew of a place where he could find many boxes ---- "Box Republic."===============================================After giving Steven directions to Box Republic, I decided to return to my blog, and validate my comments on why it is wrong to label xiaxue's blog "infantile."To those of you who need big labels (like Steven....), just so you can understand stuff, you can say xiaxue is in many ways, a "Lipstick Third Waver."-----------------------------------------------------------To the “Lipstick Third Wavers”, the potency of their sexuality and femininity was to be embraced. Instead of running away from typecasts by the mainstream media phallus, lipstick feminists wielded stereotyped female imagery as tools of power.Second Wavers had to propel the feminist movement in a very different social and cultural climate back in the 1960s. They shunned the power of sexuality because they had to fight out of the box that circumscribed them as sex objects. To be taken seriously in their war on social and economic injustices, Second Wavers burnt their bras instead of adorning them with pride.Decades later however, “Lipstick Third Wavers” are making bras a part of their arsenal. To them, “Slut” is merely “a girl with libido” and it is time to reclaim similar words of hostilities used against women and eradicate their stigmas.Third Wave feminists from the “lipstick school of thought” celebrated their sexual liberation, bras and mini-skirts with vigor. They rejected the Second Wavers' trivialization of their sexy dresses and other “girlie” items. They did not define their appearances narrowly and simplistically as projections of male sexual objectification.----------------------------------------------------------------
What I'm trying to say, in a laboured, "intellectual" way, i
s that Xiaxue's blog, the media attention she has garnered from it, and the social influence she wields as a result, combine to showcase "lipstick power" success.
Xiaxue and her blog can stay as pink and pretty as she wants and it would be endorsed by Third Wave Feminism.Just because she doesn't quote highhorse academic sources , or spew forth lengthy Westerncentric-chomsky-dodosky rhetoric, it doesn't mean she's "infantile."It simply implies that SHE IS LESS NERDY THAN YOU (STEVEN MCDERMOTT) AND ME (Meekia).Truth is, the way xiaxue looked upon the male models from the fashion shows she attended at Sg Fashion Week as sex objects, and blogged about them as such, serves as an example of how her direct, personal writing reverses the conceptions of gender stereotypes more efficiently than a 300-page thick feminist publication.
Jennifer Baumgardner and Amy Richards, two self-proclaimed advocates of the Third Wave (who co-wrote “Manifesta: Young Women, Feminism, and the Future"), identified with the “lipstick feminists" and celebrated what they termed “girlie culture.”Whether Xiaxue identifies herself as a "lipstick feminist," I don't know, and it doesn't matter.But what I do know is that she certainly revels in the celebration of "girlie culture." And one other culture she celebrates, like me, and mrbrown, and many other Singaporean bloggers, is "local Singaporean culture." We use our "lahs," "lohs" and "gahmen" and many other unique Singlish misspellings with verve and relish. Many of us do not give a hoot about foreign readers' inability to culturally decode our blogs' content. But there are some of us, who are considerate/delusional/free enough to add a link to the Coxford Singlish Dicktionary.Even with references however, the process of decoding a culture and its artefacts takes time. So does gathering empirical data, and coming up with intelligent conclusions.
huh?? Simi?? Like that your blog end liao ah! You haben say why MY BLOG is NOT INFANTILE LEH! WA LAU!!
aiya, SHADDUP LAH!! You not as cute as me mah! Plus, you are UNIVERSALLY LECHERER HOR, always invited to speak to bookworms students loh. Even if you simply smile, concentrate on your runs, and do nothing (except wear your Afro and take silly pictures,) these fans of your heartwarming family life chronicles and funny insights into Singapore society will surely say something on your behalf! Ooi, Meekia, I got a dodo-sky quote for you hor, don't say i only quote Douglas Adams. (AND I SAID DODOSKY ON PERPOSE. OK!)
WHAT DODO-sky quote?? What talking you....? oohhh, you mean DOSTOYEVSKY.-------------------------------------
Shower him with all earthly blessings, plunge him so deep into happiness that nothing is visible but the bubbles rising to the surface of his happiness, as if it were water; give him such economic prosperity that he will have nothing left to do but sleep, eat gingerbread, and worry about the continuance of world history.
Fyodor Dostoyevsky, Notes from Underground
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Technorati Tags: Singapore, Blogosphere
Ruins. 进出自如
进出自如
-- 吴韦材 小朋友以为我看到
吴哥窟的破败会很有感触。我只是笑笑，说，看完这巴戎庙外面东南西北四幅长长壁画，就去吃点柬埔寨炒饭，摊子在庙外面，我早就看见。
废墟不一定就是令人哀伤的，朋友。
即便是没有轮回，即便一切就只有当下一次，所有的成住坏空都有它每个阶段的相貌，我们适逢在哪个阶段遇上了，看看只是随缘，何须哀伤呢？
从9世纪到12世纪，三四百年里，不同的历代国王都以为自己看到从今以后永远不会再倒下去的辉煌。他们虔诚地修建，添加，扩展，堆叠，相信着每一块他当时加上去的石头，相信着就因为轮到他自己，就因为是他，所以就可以征服时间，或至少平行。但事实上，无论哪里无论是谁无论哪样作为都没发生过永远屹立的例子。
我其实在废墟里时常想笑，因为一直听到身边那些导游，老是对着废墟极力向游客奋力描画，并企图施展时光倒流的法术，“先生，你可以想像一下它当时的气派”，“先生，这是当时中南半岛上最辉煌的中心”，有些游客，真的会很努力在自己脑海里构筑一切，但越是构筑，脑海里的想像就难免越是变得不真实起来。
我反而喜欢在知道了它的历史之后就马上把一切丢开，这已经是一个废墟，也就是一个废墟，它如今连破败了也是如此壮观地骇人，也就是那么一回事。
为什么就不能纯粹以欣赏废墟那样的心情去看废墟呢？
因为人的软弱。因为人对完美无缺仍有固执的迷信。甚至因为人对已经消失不再的事物有死性难改的缅怀。因为人怕老。
我也喜欢看到吴哥窟。喜欢现在的吴哥窟因为我能够看到它现在的样子。最辉煌时期的吴哥城有一百万居民，都没看到这个样子。他们看到的是他们那时辉煌的样子，我无需羡慕他们，他们也无需羡慕我，他们看到是戏肉正在上演的繁华，而我在每一处幸存与残缺的反差里，也欣赏到破败动人的痕迹。我想芸芸众生里的芸芸，是从来都没有时间性来涵盖的，这个芸芸众生一定是指从有生命到宇宙完结之间所有有过的大小思维。就是指这个而已。
历史之所以美丽，因为它最终也会消失。能够这样想人一定会变得愉快起来。我想应该是的，而且是豁然开朗地、莫名其妙地就能愉快起来。为什么不呢？你不会再追求不堪一击的所谓完美，你不会再觉得凋零难看，你不会再介怀自己将会经历什么。这已经让你减去许多没有必要的烦恼，让你每一刻的当下，都心平气和，都看得清楚。
我们在庙外吃炒饭。要了很多小指天椒，舌尖辣呼呼，不期然竟又望到巴戎庙的四面佛佛容，辣的感觉让我又安适于自己的肉身。我问小朋友，你刚才在庙里有想什么吗？他边吃边说，有吧，想的大概都是些过后不记得的事，现在一辣，统统忘记了。
废墟里他也能进出自如，所以我们合得来.
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The above Chinese essay is from
Wu Wei Cai's weekly column at Zaobao. In it, he chronicles observations and thoughts from his recent trip to Angkor Wat.
His off-the-beaten track perspective and zany sense of irony combined to give me an extremely fresh look at the indulgent nostalgia we sometimes allow ourselves when we tour sites with intensely rich histories.
I hope you enjoyed it too. Below, is my humble attempt at translating favourite bits from this piece of work.
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为什么就不能纯粹以欣赏废墟那样的心情去看废墟呢？
Why can't we savor the ruins [of Angkor Wat], with the simple notion that they are nothing beyond piles of rubble?
因为人的软弱。因为人对完美无缺仍有固执的迷信。甚至因为人对已经消失不再的事物有死性难改的缅怀。因为人怕老。
Because we are weak. Because we devote ourselves stubbornly to the pursuit of perfection (at least in memory). Because we remain persistently sentimental about the things that have disappeared forever.
Because we are afraid of decay; of the merciless ageing and vanishing that comes with the passing of time.....
How good do you want to be?
The Nike nippon high school boys sports' club website has a typically Japanese-kamikaze-spirit but nonetheless inspiring tagline :::
何処迄行けるか
[どこまでいけるか ]DOCOMADE IKERU KA
(How good do you want to be?)
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I guess it's no longer enough in the postmodernist era to tell yourself, "JUST DO IT." The more relevant and urgent question would and should be, "How good do you want to be?"Damn good.That was what I wanted to be in terms of my fitness level for the last couple of years. Being a platoon sergeant (who was responsible for the platoon's fitness level and physical training regime) during my military service days; a basketball hoopie, and a consumer of mainstream media male imagery, meant that I had to constantly pursue a physical ideal that required ardous training and an ascetic diet. 
I didn't have problems with the tough training bit, especially during my army days. Physical training was actually a welcomed escape from the bothersome paperwork and politics in my military logistics office.It was also a really nifty feeling to know you are stronger and have better stamina than all the dim-wits around you. Those fools. If only they saw how pathetic they truly were, jacking themselves off with their self-indulgent shit-smack-sputter. (
Oh I digress...the nostalgic anger...how un-Zen... )
Well, I trained hard back in those days. The army rewarded you with off-days and money for gold awards achieved in the physical fitness test, so why sit on your fat-ass and count down the days to your official release date? Extra cash, time away from the depressing army camp that I can use to go kiss my girlfriend with... What's not to love?But despite the gold-award worthy sprinting, the 20+ pull-ups, I never had a 6-pack. No Brad Pitt abs.
Why? * sighs * I confess. Yes. I'm a foodie.
And Yes. The problem was with the dieting. Not the training.As much as I enjoyed tough training, I also savoured my roast beef, tossed noodles, pasta with rich cream, salmon belly soup, macademia chocolates...and kimchi ramen.Sure I was lean. But the Brad-Abs were never there. I could never put myself through the ultra-extreme-low-fat diet that was necessary to help them emerge from the layer of lard around my waist.
Anyway, 6-pack notwithstanding, I was fit.
WAS.
Fighting fit.
These days however, I struggle to do half the amount of pull-ups I used to execute with ease.A 2.4 KM run? How about 2.4 hours of hardcore NBA Live 2005 Playstation gaming instead?
Chips-n-DVD-sloth-ing. Yes. Sun-n-salad-swimming? Er, maybe tomorrow?
I procrastinate, as usual. But I cannot lie to myself anymore.
My annual military fitness test is round the corner. It is time to throw that bag of chips out of window, and start running. I've gained 5kg! If I don't start training for my fitness test, and start whipping myself back into shape, it's "goodbye beach-boy!" and "Hello Plump-Bum!"I not only have to tell myself, "Just do it....NOW."
I must also ask myself once more,"How good do you want to be?"
Good enough, to get the gold award. That's my target. Thank god for pride and vanity.
Cinderella from the sea
We met on the beach. The sky was overcast, and the afternoon, a light grey. She told me about the useless things she used to collect.
"I used to collect boys," she said, with a wry wicked wink in the tone of her voice, "but I stopped after one of them gave me a ladder."
"A ladder?" I was confused.
"A ladder."
"Do you miss any of them?" I asked.
As she contemplated her answer, I started to wonder how her skin would taste. I had a strange urge to lick her belly. It would be a little bit salty, but smooth.
"Yea, a couple of them" she replied, with an indifference I didn't expect after the amount of time she took to come up with an answer, "especially the one that gave me a ladder. He had a salty, but smooth belly."
A Wicked Tale
"A WICKED TALE is a 45 minute independent film written and directed by award winning filmmaker Tzang Merwyn Tong (e'Tzaintes, 2003). The experimental thriller can be described as a psycho-erotic re-imagination of the Little Red Riding Hood story. It relates a little girl's fascination with the forbidden and deals with the theme of seduction and manipulation. Tickets were sold out when the film made its World Premiere at the 34th International Film Festival Rotterdam early this year. The movie has since traveled to Berlin where it had two very successful underground screenings -- one at the Haus Der Kulturen der Welt (House of World Cultures) and the other at Potsdam Babelsberg. The movie stars Evelyn Maria Ng (from the Lightyears TV series) and Swedish Rock Musician Johan Ydstrand (Bleached). It will make its Asian Premiere at the 18th Singapore International Film festival."--- INRI studioThe word "Gothic" came to mind very quickly after I watched the trailer of "A Wicked Tale" on Tzang's website. But I guess "Psycho-erotic" is a much more fascinating and intriguing description. Tzang, aka Mister T.M.T, and I actually had a creative rendevous back in summer 2004. He was working on a "secret" new publication with Ebobolonghairdo (for the wicked new urban generation) and I did a few concept shoots for them. The idea of that "secret" new publication was to have...have...well, I can't say more, because of a promise I made to Ebobolonghairdo and Tzang. But what I can say is, I wish the "restricted, artistic" project will take off someday. And when that day comes, Mister T.M.T, Ebobolonghairdo, Missy-JauneLoupe, me, and The-Sweet-155, will be reunited in playful glory.
On a totally unrelated note, let me tell you what happened in 1976.
That was the year Liz Lexington had her photo taken while she sipped on something probably as smooth and cool as herself.
That was also the year the Chinese Physician Training College registered with the Singapore Ministry of Education, and became known as the Singapore College of Traditional Chinese Medicine.
So what's up with 1976, the Singapore College of Traditional Chinese Medicine, Ms Liz Lexington and me? Well, the dots don't exactly connect in a haphazardly beautiful manner like a Murakami novel.I justed wanted to tell the world :::: [like Tzang did with his baby, "A Wicked Tale"]Please watch my show!Episode 2 of "TCM: A New Paradigm" is scripted, directed and produced by yours truly, in collaboration with Yellowstone Productions. So is Episode 4. Ep 2 airs on 23 April 2005, Sat, 9.30pm. Please tune in if you want to know more about what Chinese medicine can do for ladies with breast illnesses and menstrual problems.Ep 4 airs on 7 May 2005, Sat, 9.30pm. Tune in, if you want to find out about male prostate and infertility issues. Meanwhile, the pilot for the series "TCM: A New Paradigm" will go on air on the 16 April, 2005, yes, at 9.30pm.So although the "restricted artistic" project has gone on hold indefinitely for me and Tzang, we've moved on to other things and found our own definitions of joy and success.I'll see you at the screening, Mister T.M.T, if my post production schedule permits. ; ]
72 ways to have sex
[A word of thanks to sidekick from Blogsup for sharing this discovery ]
Imagination (among other things) running dry?
This nifty Chinese website offers 72 interesting possibilities to help you keep going.
meekia free-tee slogan for the day:
PUSH DISCOURSE WITH INTERCOURSE.
beautiful.still.motion.snap.
photography -
bernhardwolff suave surf -
styleboost
Love Me If You Dare.
Sang, the freedom.siren.
[illustration by audaciousjoy. dec. 2004]A story about the life of John.
In search of unconditional freedom, he left his job, his family, and his daily routines.
He burned his passport and disappeared....
"I still remember the summer perfectly, it was summer and I thought, I'll disappear in the autumn..."
"And that's what I did. I hatched my plan in secret. What surprised me was that my decision didn't calm me down. I heard people who commit suicide live in great harmony with themselves and their surroundings during the period between deciding and carrying it out."
"For as long as I can remember I've felt hustled, and that feeling only grew worse after my decision."
"In the end it was very simple.
On that autumn day I got up, had breakfast, left my house and my
belongings. I walked to the central station, waited in line and bought the
same ticket as the person in front of me.
That was it.
I carried on living, but started anew."
--- RE magazine. Spring 2007.
